Body Image

I’ve been battling with my weight all my adult life. Over the last 20 years, I’ve been varying from size 12 to size 18. It goes round in a cycle. I put on weight, I go on a diet, I lose the weight and feel good, but the weight always finds me again.

However, over the last couple of years I’ve come to terms with my body and all of its imperfections. Confidence has made a huge difference to my life recently. I believe confidence comes through maturity and wisdom, and there’s no short cut to finding it.

This picture was taken by my dad on the day before my 41st birthday, and I am including it because I think it’s a good contrast to the picture in my last post. There’s over 35 years between this picture and the previous one. When I think about that, it makes me realise just what a long journey it’s been between my being the little girl in that picture and the woman in this one.

The skirt in this picture is a recent purchase. I used to have several similar ones in my wardrobe, that my stylist made me get rid of during my wardrobe detox. So I know that she wouldn’t approve, but I bought it anyway. Part of this confidence in the contemporary me is the conviction that if I like the way something looks, that’s a good enough reason to wear it.

It’s been over 18 months now since I had my styling session, and I’m a size larger now than I was then. So much of what the stylist picked out for me no longer fits. But I am comfortable with who I am, and I can say with confidence that right now, in my 40s, I’m at a good place in my life. I can probably count myself lucky because not everyone gets this far.

Life is short. You have to make what you can of it, and in the grand scheme of things, many of the trivialities we worry about – like putting on a few pounds – are really not important. The recent natural catastrophes in various parts of the world over the last few months have made me think about this quite a lot of late. None of us knows how many tomorrows we have left – so why waste today worrying about them?

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3 comments so far

  1. Michelle Moores on

    Why did she make you get rid of skirts like this?! It’s a flatering a-line shape and a good length with tights and boots to show off your legs – which are good! To be honest I thought some of the things picked (from the photos) were a bit too old for you. Yes, you may be 40 on paper but you don’t look it and have a young personality and mind-set generally I think. If you’re happy wearing something you’ll look good in it, if you’re not you won’t! It’s a great picture of you. x

  2. carole tyrrell on

    The troible is that we live in a culture which is obsessed with body shape. Being called fat is designed to be a real insult and a cheap, lazy shot as well – I frequently feel that I should have been christened ‘Fat’ because some people see that as all I am. However we also have a culture that seems to worship huge breasts on slim bodies where they just look strange and unnatural. As you say there are more important things in life to worry about.

  3. tavia. on

    I feel like, if your comfortable in what your wearing and you wear clothes that fit and flatter you, you’ll feel more comfortable. Confidence shows and your look great in that photo because of it. Not because of your size or what pieces you chose.

    Keep up the good work/attitude!


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